How To Make Your Man Perfect

Hi Everyone,

Here is a guest post written by Rain Fordyce. I love it and know you will too!

How to Attract a New Year’s Eve Kiss

1. Do not spend New Year’s Eve alone (unless you plan to kiss Dick Clark)- find a party.
2. Announce to the Universe and yourself, “I would love a New Year’s kiss” (nothing wrong with a public announcement.)
3. Wear comfortable and attractive clothing to the party (if you aren’t relaxed and feeling pretty it will show.)
4. Wear neutral lipstick (dark lipstick might scare a friendly kiss.)
5. Go early and make sure you introduce yourself to as many people as possible (be open to everyone.)
6. Have fun! (that is the point of a party, right?)
7. Tell a friend you are looking to be kissed (maybe she knows “just the guy.”)
8. Let go of the kiss happening (allow the magic to happen…)
9. Feel the joy as though you already have been kissed (share your positive vibration with the Universe.)
10. At 11:45, if you haven’t met someone you click with romantically, look around the room and ask yourself, “Who looks like they would love a kiss from me?” Walk up to him and offer your joyous celebration of the New Year with a friendly kiss at midnight.

“I threw that dozen red roses right in the wastebasket!” Nancy crowed triumphantly.

“I told him I didn’t want anything for Christmas and I meant it.”

The “I told him so” energy was so strong you could feel it from across the room. Nancy was truly annoyed. Angry at her husband because he didn’t honor an agreement.

“I can’t believe he didn’t get me anything at all!” Alison complained with an unmistakable note of bitterness in her voice. “I know we agreed to skip gifts this Christmas but I got him something anyway.”

“How could he have let me have Christmas with no gifts.”

What? Ladies, what are we doing to our men???

I know we are raised hoping that our guys will read our minds. We coyly drop hints about things we want to have happen in our relationships and then we get pissed when they don’t get it.

We finally strong arm them into a decision, like, with money so tight, let’s skip gifts this Christmas. And then get mad when he follows through.

Can you imagine throwing a dozen red roses away? You may think, “I would NEVER do that!” And that may be true.

But, how many times do we dismiss our husbands and boyfriends by our attitudes and behavior?

Guys think we are impossible to figure out and some of them have quit trying, bless their hearts! We owe it to ourselves to be specific when it comes to asking for things. As Dr. Phil likes to say, “We men like the dots really close together.”

That is so true. If you want to limit gift buying, that may be the best decision for you and your guy, especially if you are trying to change your spending habits. But, there are many other options for giving heart felt gifts that don’t cost a penny.

Here are a few:
• Give him heart-felt compliments every day. There are things he is proud of at this point of his life. Tell him how proud you are of him. Don’t be fake. Be open to noticing what he is doing that is working.
• Pick up a few things around the house with a heart full of love and compassion instead of annoyance and exasperation. Imagine you are straightening the house for an important visitor. Put your Ipod on and rock out while you are working!
• Start saying, “I might be wrong about this but…..” before you share your opinion or feelings. This works like a charm to soften your approach and if he is disarmed, he will hear you better.
• Be honest. If you want a gift, don’t agree to no gifts!!! I know this seems simple but, ladies, it is unfair to make a decree and then get mad because he honors it. Set a price limit or ask for a book from Barnes and Noble but do yourself a favor and be direct about what you want.
• Give your man a facial massage. If he is skittish about this, that tells you a lot about his comfort level with other than sexual intimacy. If that is the case, start with a hand massage. Massaging his hands with rich creamy lotion will feel good to both of you.

How about you? What things have you done that have brought a grin to your man’s face and haven’t cost you a thing?

Make this your LAST lonely holiday season!

I am gathering a group of women who are ready for change.

I’m working on “Love is Mine in 2009″ and want the top 5 frustrations of being single at this point in YOUR life.

I am fine tuning my focus and I want YOU to be part of creating all the LOVE and AFFECTION we can possibly enjoy in 2009.

Add your frustrations to the list in the comments section and then join the FaceBook group: “Love is Mine in 2009″ http://tinyurl.com/4cnjgl

Thanks a million for your input!!

Say this outloud: I am 100% confident that Love is Mine in 2009.

If this feels like a big fat lie, come to my party! We are going to change that!

Celebrating LOVE,
Catherine

P.S. Don’t forget to add the five things YOU hate about being single at this point of your life in the comments section!

Ladies, what kind of year is 2009 going to be for you in the relationship department? Have you given that any thought?

This year, Larry and I celebrated our third anniversary in Tuscany. I will never forget it. I am so lucky to have met this man. Finding love in my 50’s has been amazing.

I love feeling connected to Larry even though it doesn’t happen as often as I like. You know how it is when you start living a parallel life….both keeping up with personal routines. I am learning how to get his attention and we are both committed to staying close. I love how easy it is to be with him, we have a sweet and satisfying rapport with one another.

I am excited about my gift for him this year! Even though we agreed to a small gift budget this year,  I came up with a no cost plan to give him a special and very personal gift . Want to join me? Give these gifts to your guy over the next thirty days. Just thirty short days, and then let us know how it goes.

There is only one catch…..you can’t tell him anything about it.  Just watch and see what happens.

1. Find something pink, very cool if you have a rose quartz around for this one but a candle or silk flower will work too, and put it under your bed. Your reminder that this bed is a precious place, one that craves nurturing. Let the pink object serve as a symbol of love and peace between the two of you.

2. Begin to agree with your man more often. No, I don’t mean when he’s on your last nerve. Believe me, we all struggle with that one! I mean agreeing over insignificant things. When he tells you something about a news story or expresses an opinion about something that doesn’t have to do with you….agree with him. Your man LOVES to hear you say, “You’re right about that.” “Yes, I see what you mean.” Or “Thanks for saying it like that, I didn’t see that angle.” It is very easy to say these things over issues unimportant to me!

3. Choose one time a week for the next four weeks when you allow him to have his opinion without you trying to change it. Practice listening and saying anything from the list above. Just one time a week…you can do it!

4. Plan one meal a week that you know he will love. As you plan it, choose to remember your first few dates. Remember how hot your were for while you were waiting for him to get to your apartment? Mmmmm. Prepare the meal with those memories in mind.

5. Find one new thing to do that is a hobby or craft. I bet you have been getting the urge to pick up a long forgotten hobby/ Maybe an instrument is gathering dust in your closet. Decide that for a month, you are going to take action and revitalize an old interest.

6. Write him a series of love letters that you don’t plan to mail. Plan on at least four but you can do as many as you like. Pour out your heart to him. Tell him what you want to see for the two of you in 2009. Confront him if you need to, be completely real. Know that you are connecting to his deepest self with your words and especially with your feelings. Doing this by yourself first will bring amazing words to your mind when you DO choose to talk to him, IF you choose to talk to him.

7. Watch for small opportunities to do random acts of kindness. I know my husband loves to have the counters clear of mail, cat toys, newspapers and all the rest of the kitchen clutter. I love to straighten those counters knowing that his pleasure at the sight of the tidy kitchen is one of my love expressions to him and it is easy for me!

8. Choose to overlook one of his annoying habits for one month. I am sure you can think of one! Make a pact with yourself that you will catch yourself noticing it and simply stop yourself and think of something else.

9. Give him one extra hug a day. Not a hug because YOU need one, but a hug for him completely. When you are hugging him, choose to stand in for every person he now knows and all of the others, past and future. Hold him in your arms and shower him with that kind of love. Be an extension cord between all who love him and his heart.

10. On the thirtieth day of the month, go look in the mirror and congratulate yourself! Check your options. You may want to continue, but I have a feeling you two will be in an entirely different orbit by then! Act on the creative connection ideas that occur to you, no one knows your man better than you!

Are you in? Add a comment and let us know your are with us! Print this page and make your action plan. Start with the ones that feel more natural to you. The order is not important. Some may feel awkward at first but just let yourself fumble a little. It’s worth it! Merry Christmas to you and your man! Your 2009 is going to rock!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sn6qkqvTF_o&eurl

It was a Christmas lesson I will never forget.

My kids were 5 and 6 years old and I was in the midst of my super woman days. I made all of my Christmas cards, decorated packages with glitter and bows, baked batches of Christmas cookies and volunteered to help with the school’s Holiday Pageant.

Not being able to say no to anybody, I ‘volunteered’ to collect donated food from the bowling league I belonged to. Having procrastinated a bit, it was now Monday of Christmas week and I was scrambling to find a place to donate the food.

Why, I don’t know, but every food pantry I called was closed or not accepting donations. I was exhausted and frustrated. Plus I was angry at my self for putting this off to the last minute and felt responsible to the group to get this food to needy people before Christmas.

After 10 phone calls, I finally found a connection to a Hmong family living in a depressed area of my city. Still clinging to the desire to teach my kids the true meaning of Christmas, I asked them to look in their rooms for a couple of books or outgrown toys to add to the food for this family of 12 I had found.

My kids brought me a handful of broken crayons.

Fiercely protective of their belongings, they were unable to understand the request. “But these are MY toys; I don’t want to give them away.”

Becoming more frustrated by the moment, I was becoming harsh with the kids and then of course was feeling guilty for being such a grouch.

I piled us all into the car, loaded all the food and off we went.

While on the way, my daughter asked where we were going and I tried to explain about the part of the city the family lived in and why things were tough for them. In the midst of my explanation, I mentioned that they lived on 34th street.

“Oh” she gasped with wonder, “Our own Miracle on 34th Street”.

My mood instantly melted as my heart registered with the truth of her observation. We were making a miracle, procrastination, broken crayons and all. The real meaning of Christmas WAS there….in spite of all my plans and explanations.

As we carried bag after bag of groceries into the house, the gratitude on the face of the pregnant mother of the brood was unmistakable. Understanding not a word of English, she kept thanking us over and over in her native language.

I wish you your own Miracle on 34th Street experience this year. I hope you are surprised by the wonder of the season in a totally unexpected way. Take time to look into someone’s eyes and let them know you care. Surprise someone with a handwritten note of thanks. Leave an extra large tip for the people that serve you.

Do Christmas different this year. You will love how you feel.

Come tonight and join Nan Akasha and I as we blast through money obstacles and create a little cash for the holidays.

After last weeks class, I got good news on my auto insurance…$350 savings, several coupons for free meals and buy one get one frees and one of my coaches reduced my fee for the holidays.

Oh, my car loan company gifted me with skipping December’s payment! Woo Hoo!!!

All together, it was over $1400. I am taking MY honey out for a romantic dinner.

How about you?

Hot Holiday Cash And Survival Guide Class TONIGHT!

REGISTER HERE: http://tinyurl.com/5b7k5n

Disappointment sucks. The higher your hopes, the further the fall when disappointment hits. Can you avoid it? How do you take away the sting?

Let me tell you a story. Forty or fifty years ago, a little girl was getting ready for Christmas. She had spotted a pair of red patent leather shoes and in her heart of hearts that is all she wanted. She pictured herself wearing them as her friends oohed and ahed with admiration and jealousy.

Every time she walked by the store window in her little town, she stopped to admire those beautiful shoes.

When the big day finally arrived, she ran to the Christmas tree and sure enough, there was a shoe box shaped present with HER name on it!! Eagerly she waited for her mom to distribute the gifts. With bated breath she held the small box with the santa paper and red bow.

At last it was her turn, she tore through the paper and sure enough, is WAS a shoe box. Heart racing, she tossed away the lid and her heart sank in disbelief. In the box, wrapped in tissue was a jump rope. Too young to hide her disappointment, she burst into tears and ran out of the room.

Her mom, unaware of her secret wish, reacted as many of us do. She frowned and told her to be grateful, that other children had to do without at Christmas and that she should be ashamed of herself.

The roots of disappointment are deep in all of us. There is no escape. So it is a curse, right?

Nope, dead wrong. Disappointment is an OPPORTUNITY. Tough things happen to each and everyone of us. Because our imaginations are so strong and we anticipate what we THINK will delight us, we set ourselves up for disappointment all the time. Why?

Because with each adult disappointment we can go back and relieve the remnants of childhood misperceptions. Countless times through our growing up years we are faced with making decisions on our child like perceptions.

One of these decisions is often….disappointment sucks and if I try hard enough, I will never be disappointed again. The problem with that decision is that it makes no sense at all.

Imagine if Walt Disney let disappointment stop him….would he have, could he have persevered through 299 bank loan denials before the 300th bank said yes?

Imagine if Thomas Edison let disappointment stop him before he finally succeeded in developing the light bulb?

Disappointment is a treasure. The worse it hurts, the more power there is under it to blast you to a new level of relationship success. Hiding from disappointment does not make it go away., it only paves the way for deeper pain the next time.

Learn to use the power in disappointment to unearth past hurts that are ready to be released. That was then and this is now. Make a new choice for yourself about the dramas of the past and you will find the patience and wisdom you need to talk to your man about what is bothering you.

10. Whine about what your best friend got and how you never get anything you like.
9. Drag him to the mall with a notebook and stroll around pointing out things you like.
8. Remind him how much he botched the last three gift giving occasions.
7. Tell him how your last boyfriend always picked the best gifts for you.
6. Stop in front of every jewelry store and drool over diamonds.
5. Pick your favorite store and tell him a gift certificate from there is perfect.
3. Cut out pictures of things you like and tape them to his bathroom mirror.
2. Agree to a $25 limit and stick to it.
1. Ask him to plan a romantic evening for the two of you and surprise you!

Remember, he loves you. He knows that Christmas is special to you. He may just be insecure about buying you the perfect gift, especially if you want a ring. Be patient and kind. Praise him for being thoughtful and accept his gift with a sense of light heartedness and he will feel awesome for pleasing you!

Doesn’t it seem like the Grinch and Scrooge are stealing Christmas this year?

Santa Still Believes In Magic

And so do I.

I am THRILLED to bits to be presenting a three part class with my new and amazing friend Nan Akasha. We met in the spring when I took one of her classes on the Spirit of Money. She is an amazing teacher and coach who specializes in getting to the heart of self doubt and self sabotage! She rocks!!

We are giving the first class to you as our Christmas Gift to you! It is scheduled for this Wednesday night, December 3, at 8 eastern, 7 central and 5 pacific.

Who couldn’t use a little extra Holiday Cash?

Click here for all the details! http://tinyurl.com/5b7k5n

We know it is last minute but boy is it worth it!!

Special Holiday Gift Catalog

What a lucky girl I am!! My friend Bonnie Snyder invited me to put my CD story “Five Lost Secrets To Attracting Love” in her holiday gift catalog!

I am delighted to support her efforts and you can find my CD as well as other fabulous self care gift items right here:

http://www.serenitypathways.com/docs/sp_holiday_catalog_2008.pdf

Thanks so much for all of the love and support this year! Christmas may be a bit of a challenge for some of us this year but I have a little secret….

Love is always there. Love soothes. Love comforts. Love brings life when things look bleak. Trust in love.

Bless you!
Catherine